Create Everyday Intimacy to bring back those butterflies — and keep them
Unlock instant access to Better, Hotter, More and tons of exclusive bonuses
Rekindle your sexual chemistry & emotional connection
"Life-changing & relationship-saving. Truly."
"While we knew from the start that we were destined for forever, it didn’t stop us from having some relationship issues. I sent out an SOS to the universe, asking for help. Then something told me to search podcasts. I happened upon you coincidentally (no such thing), which led my husband and I to Better Hotter More. I couldn’t believe the healing I felt just from your voices. My husband was hooked and still calls you his best friends, we have since bought many of your guides. That shit WORKS! We have never been happier or closer. We owe you!"
When you first met, you thought you’d be madly in love forever. Sure, you knew the honeymoon phase might die down a little — but you didn’t think it would feel like this.
You both are so freaking busy. Work is crazy, maybe you’ve got kids, aging parents, and a million other things.
“Us time” is always last on the list — and let’s not even get started about your sex life…
Sometimes I wonder if I even like sex anymore (in fact, did I ever?)
We don’t really feel like a team anymore — conflicts feel bigger, favors feel more annoying
We only talk about our sex life (or lack of) when we’re complaining … (“You never initiate” or “you only pay attention to me when you’re horny”)
Sex feels complicated — there’s a lot more turn-OFFs than turn-ONs in our dynamic lately
We’re so busy and exhausted and rarely have 5 seconds to spend together (& then we feel guilty about that)
When my partner tries to get me in the mood, it’s always at the worst time! It feels annoying and inconsiderate
We’re so busy and exhausted and rarely have 5 seconds to spend together (& then we feel guilty about that)
Sex feels complicated — there’s a lot more turn-OFFs than turn-ONs in our dynamic lately
We only talk about our sex life (or lack of) when we’re complaining … (“You never initiate” or “you only pay attention to me when you’re horny”)
When my partner tries to get me in the mood, it’s always at the worst time! It feels annoying and inconsiderate
We don’t really feel like a team anymore — conflicts feel bigger, favors feel more annoying
Sometimes I wonder if I even like sex anymore (in fact, did I ever?)
Sometimes I wonder if I even like sex anymore (in fact, did I ever?)
We don’t really feel like a team anymore — conflicts feel bigger, favors feel more annoying
We only talk about our sex life (or lack of) when we’re complaining … (“You never initiate” or “you only pay attention to me when you’re horny”)
Sex feels complicated — there’s a lot more turn-OFFs than turn-ONs in our dynamic lately
We’re so busy and exhausted and rarely have 5 seconds to spend together (& then we feel guilty about that)
When my partner tries to get me in the mood, it’s always at the worst time! It feels annoying and inconsiderate
Sex feels complicated — there’s
a lot more turn-OFFs than turn-ONs in our dynamic lately
We’re so busy and exhausted
and rarely have 5 seconds to spend together (& then we feel guilty about that)
We don’t really feel like a team anymore — conflicts feel bigger,
favors feel more annoying
We only talk about our sex life (or lack of) when we’re complaining … (“You never initiate” or “you
only pay attention to me when
you’re horny”)
When my partner tries to get me in the mood, it’s always at the worst time! It feels annoying and inconsiderate
Sometimes I wonder if I even like
sex anymore (in fact, did I ever?)
You’re both in survival mode, jumping from problem to problem without any time to catch your breath or check in with each other —
At one point you probably told yourself, it’s fine! It’s just a season of busy-ness — things will go back to normal soon.
But they didn’t. And this is your new normal.
and sex becomes just another thing on your endless to-do list…
(and that doesn't feel sexy to anyone…)
(ugh, this feels so heartbreaking!)
Every couple wants easy, carefree, and sexy intimacy in their relationship…
But most couples don’t know how to make what you see in the movies and read in romance books (ACOTAR anyone??) a reality.
So we shrug our shoulders, accept that sex must not be all it’s cracked up to be — and settle for so much less in our relationships than we deserve.
Because when you stop prioritizing sex, you stop prioritizing intimacy — and when you stop prioritizing intimacy — you don't have much of a relationship at all...
What if sex has a ripple effect throughout your entire relationship?
(Our guess? That’s why you ended up here)
We know — this might feel a bit dramatic to say…
…but after a 2-decade long career working with couples, we’ve got compelling evidence that your sex life is a primary indicator of relationship happiness, fulfillment and ultimately — whether you’re gonna stay together…
When you stepped into your relationship no one handed you a manual that walked you through exactly how to stay happily in-love and have steamy sex for the rest of your life WHILE juggling careers, kids, and all the rest…
So it is perfectly normal to find yourself here. (In fact, 90% of people said they want a better sex life!)
Here’s a funny comparison… you weren't born speaking Spanish, and no one expects you to just “be fluent.” If you want to speak Spanish, you know you need classes, immersion, practice…
Well, no one ever taught us how to do sex and relationships either… and yet we put all this pressure on ourselves to know how to have effortless, easy, sexy romance for the rest of our lives? Make it make sense!
That’s where we come in!
Vanessa’s a licensed psychotherapist with 20+ years of experience in the sex therapy field — and Xander’s a regular dude who left his job at Google so he could talk about sex all day with his wife. 😎
Together, we work with couples to bring more love and orgasms into their lives.
We know you want true and lasting intimacy but the big problem is that no one ever taught you how.
We’re here to change that! Because honestly, you deserve more.
“Is this it? Is this as good as it gets?”
Nope. It gets better.
You really don’t have to settle for meh.
As we worked our way through our own shortcomings, struggles, and ruts, we mapped out a formula for creating the type of intimacy that sparks all those fireworks you’ve been missing — again and again.
Like most couples — we’ve had our fair share of challenges in our own relationship. Like you, we’ve also caught ourselves prioritizing life over “us” until one day we were pretty miserable, disconnected, and thinking…
After 20+ years (and working with tens of thousands of couples) we’ve developed a proven, five-step system to create Everyday Intimacy that’ll help you connect more deeply, rekindle your fiery chemistry, and remind you just how much you turn each other on.
(because if you want to have an extraordinary relationship, you’ve gotta be able to talk about it)
(the key ingredient to feeling open to intimacy in the first place)
(to help you understand what you actually need to get excited about sex)
(because let’s be real, why would you crave something that isn’t enjoyable?)
(aka, how to keep it spicy for life!)
(that’ll have your friends saying — “damn, I want what they have”)
Taught by a real-life couple (and licensed sex therapist), the course covers every aspect of intimate, passionate sex from initiation to orgasm — giving you actionable tips for creating the sex (and love) life you’ve always dreamed of.
All from the privacy and comfort of your own home.
Impactful, fluffless content that gives you the best bang for your buck without taking up your whole evening
We’re calling ‘home-play’ that’ll put to practice the stuff you’re learning in ‘class’
All of these activities and materials can be explored from the privacy of your home
With an entire vault full of additional sexy bonuses, guides and resources
Videos & adventures that’ll have you and your partner looking forward to a night-in
Full of techniques and tips designed to pump major excitement into the bedroom
Ways to make sex more enticing, pleasurable, and frequent
We’re talking 10 minutes tops — with now-go-and-do-this types of activities. Plus, a ton of very fun, flirty and sexy bonuses make the cherry on top. 🍒
We’re talking 10 minutes tops — with
now-go-and-do-this types of
activities. Plus, a ton of very fun, flirty and
sexy bonuses make the cherry on top. 🍒
In fact we’ve had so many people bring this up we literally made a guide called “How to Get Your Partner to Sign Up for Better, Hotter, More.”
It is SO normal to feel uncomfortable bringing up sex and closeness with your partner — and that’s actually a big chunk of what we talk about in Better, Hotter, More. It’s a completely shame- and blame-free approach to sex.
If the idea of bringing up intimacy and sex to your partner makes you want to hide under the covers (or feels like an argument waiting to happen…)
*you’ve got 14 days to give it a try and if it’s not for you, we’ll give you your money back no questions asked!
We’re so confident you’ll love Better, Hotter, More — that we’re giving you a risk-free, money-back guarantee?
The most common objections — and gentle rebuttals — to the whole “I don’t know about this” thing
Everything you’ve ever been taught about sex is wrong. No joke. This module will deconstruct what we call the F*cking Fairytale and how it sabotages every relationship. We’ll get the two of you talking about sex comfortably, and show you ways to deliver feedback and requests that will instantly make sex way hotter!
How to Get Your Partner On Board ($ Literally Priceless)
60 therapist-backed adventures that’ll remind you of why you fell in love in the first place (and you can do them all from home)
Foreplay starts way before the bedroom — and you’re about to find out why. Unravel your sexual motivations, figure out what the heck emotional intimacy has to do with getting naked — and break-up with that “we feel so far apart” feeling.
The Connection Challenge ($139 Value)
Eradicate resentment and frustration from your relationship by redistributing the mental workload and restoring balance. *Hint* it’ll heat back things up too!
The Mental Load Workbook ($25 Value)
Bring back date nights full of laughter, flirtatious banter, and reconnection
A Year of Creative Dates ($29 Value)
Discover the secret to magnetic attraction, unshakeable confidence and way more sex
If your partner frequently turns you down (or you find yourself a little turned off more often than you like) — this one’s going to strip all that down. Initiation is a science, and we’re decodifying the process. Leave this module feeling way more confident about how to get your partner — or yourself — in the mood.
The Art of Initiation ($89 Value)
You both deserve to feel blissed-out in bed. This guide will teach you how to have sex that’s truly mind blowing for both of you. (Hint: almost everything we’ve been taught about intercourse is wrong)
Wouldn’t it be nice if your partner came with a user manual? Yeah, you’re going to get one. We’re breaking down the orgasm gap, reconfiguring what pleasure looks like and making sure that both of you get some. PS — you’ll both be waaaay more into sex after this.
Next Level Intercourse ($99 Value)
Treat your partner to the best foreplay experience they’ve ever had with detailed, illustrated instructions that’ll probably turn you on as you go. Includes our How To Orgasm From Foreplay course, Secrets Of What Men And Women Really Want guide, Foreplay Cheatcode worksheet, and Get Comfortable Receiving Foreplay masterclass
The Upgraded Edition of the Ultimate Foreplay Guides ($255 Value)
60 different sensual and sexual challenges that have revived thousands of relationships and inspired countless orgasms
Couples who do new things together, stay together. This module takes you both on a journey of what-if’s and maybes that’ll leave you with an exciting (but uninitimidating!) to-do list so you can keep it spicy for life.
The Sex Challenge ($139 Value)
One of the hottest things you can do with your mouth — is getting fluent in the sexiest love language of all. Get hundreds of examples and discover your authentic voice in the bedroom
Dirty Talk 101 ($69 Value)
Never feel like it’s same-old again — with your very own customizable list that’ll eliminate the guesswork and decode the whole fantasy thing
The Sexual Bucket List ($29 Value)
A shame-free breakdown of all the things you’ve been curious about with techniques and illustrations to show you the smart, clean, and brand ‘spankin’ fun side of your sex life
Butt Stuff ($69 Value)
Recordings of other couples’ questions about intimacy, sex & connection — and our answers
Like homework, but make it sexy 😏 These exercises are designed to take the work even deeper (in the best way!) and give you practical things to do with each other — so you’re not just staring at another computer screen together
Record your thoughts and answers so you can refer back to it like a little user manual on your relationship
These extracurriculars give you and your partner a next-level deep dive into niche topics while answering some very sexy questions. Did we mention that they’re special editions you can’t get anywhere else?
Rediscovering Desire — $99 Value
This masterclass is for anyone who feels disconnected from their sex drive (or struggles to get (“in the mood”). Learn how libido actually works so you can make it work FOR YOU
Supercharge Your Confidence in the Bedroom — $99 Value
Practical tools for getting over shyness, shame, and awkwardness — to experience more freedom and fun
Bring Your Sex Back To Life — $99 Value
How scheduling sex can actually be sexy, if you do it the right way! This masterclass is perfect for busy couples and parents
16 Science-Backed Techniques For Loving Your Body — $99 Value
If bad body image gets in the way of enjoying sex, this guide will help you get out of your head and into the moment
A Survivor’s Guide — $99 Value
How to reclaim your sex life after abuse — with straightforward techniques that can help you feel safe and actually enjoy pleasure
The Modern Man’s Guide to Conquering Performance Pressure — $249 Value
For men who want to have more control over their erections, orgasms, and pleasure — and become the kind of lover that their partner genuinely desires
The Golden Rules of Communication — $99 Value
Communication is another thing that we were never taught how to do! This guide walks you through super simple ways to improve your communication and get on the same page
Create Rock Solid Relationship Habits In Just A Few Minutes A Day — $99 Value
The best resource for couples who are feeling like they’re in a tough spot right now — this masterclass gives you practical advice on rebuilding trust, kindness, and connection
(just the bonuses are worth $1866 — not even including the value of the core curriculum!)
Better, Hotter,
More is the
LAST sex
course you’ll
ever have to
get from us.
Better, Hotter, More is the LAST sex course you’ll ever have to get from us.
"Vanessa & Xander make you feel like you’re sitting down for a drink with our longtime friends chatting about life, sex, & relationships (except they are actually qualified to give the advice w/ Vanessa being a sex therapist!). They truly are vulnerable & open to allow everyone to learn so much from them!"
"Currently having the best sex of my life with a partner of three years. And we have a BLAST together! Sharing just so you know the goofy/fun can go hand in hand with great sex. And yes, I totally believe we will set an amazing example for our kids to break generational curses too! Thank you for what you do!!"
"My partner and I had sex last night. He finished first and then says to me, “ok now what do you need?” Like what?! So hot! We Learned this from you guys. Thank you. Our sex life has improved sooo much. Every sexual encounter lately has been positive which was NOT the norm for us in our entire 12 years of marriage!"
Think about how much joy (and misery) your relationship is capable of bringing you.
Like some of your worst times probably came after a big fight or disconnection — in the same way your BEST times come from beautiful moments shared with your partner!
(Well, when you put it that way…)
— without breaking the bank or spending 6 months in therapy.
When Vanessa was seeing couples for therapy, each session started at $500. And TBH, it takes a lot more than one session to make much progress…
That’s why we started creating self-paced, DIY at home, instantly accessible materials that can make a HUGE difference in your relationship — without all of the hassle and awkwardness of seeing someone in person.
With Better, Hotter, More — you’ll get the value of AT LEAST ten therapy sessions for the price of one.
It’s totally normal to invest in your self, your business, your family and your personal growth — but it can feel intimidating to invest in your relationship…
But hang tight for a sec —
Sex so good you finally understand what all the fuss is about. Both you and your partner will explore new techniques that give you THE MOST pleasure, deepen your understanding of one another, and totally upgrade your orgasms.
With our secret tools and guides, you’ll get in touch with your body (and your partner’s), discover what you like, and learn how to ask for it.
By prioritizing each other, sex becomes irresistible — and even if you’ve been on the lower end of the libido scale — soon you’ll be craving sex too!
You’ll develop a stronger connection with your partner, becoming a powerful team inside and outside the bedroom.
All the answers to your
Better, Hotter, More questions!
You’re not alone! Most people struggle to talk about sex openly with their partner. We’ve been there ourselves.
That’s why you’ll also receive a bonus guide called, “How To Get Your Partner On Board With Better, Hotter, More”! You’ll get specific examples covering a wide variety of scenarios. And you’ll even get follow-up responses you can use to keep the conversation going!
Our recommendation is to take the course together. We think you’ll have the most impact if you’re discovering our techniques at the same time.
But we also want to acknowledge that couples are rarely on the same page about this kind of stuff. So you can absolutely go through the course solo, and bring the tips and techniques back into your relationship. We’ll show you how.
Look, we totally get how busy and overwhelming life can feel. We’ve never gotten a message from a couple saying, “We have so much free time! Do you have any courses that will take us longer to get through?”
And we want to be clear in saying that there are just some seasons in life that are more focused on survival. When you’re dealing with things like major illness, financial stress, or grief, intimacy may need to take a backseat, and that’s OK.
Survival mode aside, we want to give you a little bit of tough love...
Sometimes when we say, “I don’t have the time,” what it really means is, “It’s not important to me right now.”
We all say that our relationships are important to us. But here’s the tough question you need to ask yourself: “What am I doing to show that I value my relationship?”
If you’re in one of those survival seasons where intimacy isn’t a priority, or if your relationship truly isn’t important to you, don’t join now. We’re sending you our love and support.
Better, Hotter, More is only for couples who want to reignite the spark NOW. It’s for couples who have full lives AND are willing to make space to prioritize each other.
Plus, there’s some great news... we truly believe that this course is quickly going to turn into the highlight of your day. And that it’s going to be so uplifting that it’ll actually make you feel like you have MORE energy to tackle everything life throws your way. Because when the two of you feel like a team, you’re unstoppable!
We designed this course to be as quick and effective as possible. We have no interest in wasting your time, so we’ve boiled each module down to contain the most crucial information you’ll need. Each lesson is just a few minutes.
Plus, you get lifetime access to Better, Hotter, More, so you can take however long you want, and come back to it as many times as you want.
We’re all working with totally different budgets, and “expensive” is relative.
If you’re in a situation where you’re deciding between paying your rent and purchasing Better, Hotter, More, please don’t buy this course!
If you’re in a place where you can swing the cost, but you still find yourself hesitating, our answer is pretty similar to the questions about time above.
Sometimes “It’s too expensive” actually means, “It’s not important to me right now.”
Life is expensive, and a lot of our money goes towards basic needs. But most of us also mindlessly spend money on things that don’t really bring us much pleasure, connection, or joy. (Like that new pair of boots that you wore exactly once because they were too tight in the toes.)
So ask yourself — “Is my spending actually bringing me happiness? Am I investing in the things that truly matter to me? Is my relationship worth investing in?”
And remember — getting through all these techniques in couples therapy would cost thousands of dollars, and you’re also getting thousands of dollars worth of bonuses!
Yes, we offer a 14 day money-back guarantee, so you can try Better, Hotter, More risk-free. If you decide it’s not right for you, just send us an email within the 14 day period and we’ll give you a full refund.
We all get busy and comfortable.
Life gets in the way and sometimes our relationship slips to the bottom of our to-do list…
(and that’s okay, it happens!!)
It’s completely normal for people to feel the sparks die off… but it doesn’t have to stay that way.
You and your partner deserve to feel loved, sexy, and close. You deserve to experience toe-curling, soul shaking sex — and not just once, but often.
With Better, Hotter, More you’ll prioritize your relationship, strengthen your connection and have better sex.